it's better to have a willful child than complacent one

It's better to have a willful child than a complacent one.

It's better to have a willful child than a complacent one.

It's better to have a willful child than a complacent one.

I know this is true. 

I believe it with every fiber of my being. 

I just can't help wishing from time to time that they might be a little bit less willful...

With a house full of willful souls somethings gotta give. 

And it's usually this people-pleasing mama.

I know it's my fault. 

I'm not consistent 

strong enough

or even half as willful as most.

At the end of the day most of the fight has left me.

Some days I feel more beat down about it than I should.

Today is one of those days.

Some days I feel pulled in so many different directions it's tough to grin and bear it.

But there is a positive that I'm going to try and dwell on.

My willful children are strong and self assertive. 

I pray for it every night- that my children will grow up to be, "strong and confident, kind and generous, able to achieve all their dreams."  I say those words for them to hear every night.

I know that trait will take them far in life,

even if it does give me dark circles,

baggy eyes,

and more grey hairs than i can now count.

I'm looking forward to consistently getting a good night sleep,

for the first time in the past 10 years.

Dr. Ferber is going to be my hero.

I just know it.

He's gotta be.

The date is set.

Little Miss is staying in her bed-

falling asleep by herself in her own bed

and staying put all night long.

Monday, January 2 is the dawn of a new era.

Perhaps, with a good night sleep the rest of the troubles will feel less overwhelming.

First things first, you know.

sleeping angel

why wouldn't i want to snuggle this little angel with her full little lips, curls, long eye lashes, and dimpled chin all night long?

oh yeah. 

because she flails her arms and kicks like she's training for the tai chi olympics. 

and coughs in my face-

all

night

long!

help me dr. ferber!

Olive Oyl

I've been terribly sporadic in my posting. 

Some days I'll post twice.

Sometimes I'll go long stretches until I post again.

It's kind of the story of my life. 

I'm really dedicated to something for a good stretch of time.  Then that attention will wax and wane- like the moon, but far less predictable.

One thing is certain, my attention to my family comes first.  Everything else is worked in around them.

I think that's how it's supposed to be.

Lately I'm feeling like Popeye's Olive Oyl.  Like I'm stretched between a little girl who is into my every bit of business and being allowed to stay up later since she's getting bigger, and a little girl who won't let me be in the wee hours of the night.  She's stuck to me like glue from about midnight until morning.  Then there are two little boys who are also in need of love, attention, and affection.

Now I get it when my mom says her big kids exhausted her mentally and the little ones exhausted her physically.

I think I can only stretch so far.

I'd made up my mind to "Ferberize" Elsa over Christmas break.

But then she got sick.

Not just a little sniffle, but take-her-to-the-(McCleary)ER-on-Christmas-Eve because her ears were causing so much pain.  She sounds like a 60 year old bar maid with her raspy voice and broken blood vessels in one eye.

So, as much as I'd like to be the tough guy (so I can sleep in any position I want during the night...) I'm waiting until she's healthy before I'm mean and make her stay in her bed all night long.

And, again with the laundry complaints, but last week laundry got way out of hand (big surprise).  Here's a little sampling of the clean laundry I folded and put away yesterday.

Plus another FIVE LOADS!  I think there's something to the whole keeping just 3 pairs of pants and 3 shirts for each kid.  Might make my life a whole lot easier.

This is what happens when I put my chores on the back burner.  It's not pretty.

But we had a nice holiday with family, even if Mark did have to work Christmas day- at least he was able to go in at 10:30am so he could have Christmas morning and Christmas Eve with all the excitement and anticipation, at home with us.

Even with all the trials and tribulations, I know I lead a charmed life.

I have 4 happy and healthy (for the most part) kids, a husband I adore, fantastic friends, and a great family.

There isn't much more I would wish for.

Now, I wonder if I'll post again before the New Year...

Santa 2011

Every year we've taken our kids to see Santa to get their pictures taken.

It's the only annual photos we get of the kids (aside from school pictures) so I look forward to watching the changes in the kids reflected on Santa's lap.

The first year we thought we'd take baby Sarina to Portland's Nordstrom's so we could do a little tax free shopping while she was young enough to not realize what we were doing.  We were assuming Portland's Nordstrom's had a real santa with real photos just like in Seattle. 

I was bitterly disappointed to be handed a polariod.

LAME!

Every year after that we've gone to downtown Seattle instead.

Now, our photos aren't postcard perfect by any means.

But they certainly give a snapshot into the kids lives at the time they were taken.

Poor little Sarina trying to hold it together while her baby brother melted down next to her on a strange man's lap.

Sweet Charlie with his crazy long hair and bed head, looking like a poor neglected 3rd child.

Elsa content surrounded by brothers and a big sister.

This year they added a super sized IPad where the kids could make it snow while they waited for Santa.

Here they are getting ready for the real photographer to take their photo.

And yes, Elsa's wearing a skirt!  She also wore one for her preschool's Christmas performance!

Here's a youtube video #1 and youtube video #2 of them telling Santa what they want for Christmas. 

I LOVE santa's response to Carl's request.

I also love that both Sarina and Carl play with Elsa's hair when they're nervous. 

And I love it more that she looks so annoyed about it.

Here they are when it's all said and done. 

Next stop, Red Mill!  Best burgers ever!

Kids Say the Darndest Things

This conversation was held at the breakfast bar this morning.

Charlie: "When you were a kid did you turn into a grown-up?"

Me: "Yup."

Charlie:  "Will Carl too?"

Me: "Yes, and you will too."

Carl: "Then a grandpa then an angel."

I think angels are always on his mind.

I wish I could listen into my kids thoughts.

I guess recording some of these random conversations will have to do.

You Get What You Pay For

Recently, I read a blog that I thought was so sweet it brought a little lump to my throat. 

The woman who wrote it is so creative and has such a lovely home.  It's one blog I read fairly often (because she is set up so that it emails notices when she posts and she often has nice downloadable documents and crafts I'm inspired to try from time to time).

It was funny timing. 

My husband went to Goodwill shortly after I read it to look for a goofy Christmas party ensemble.

We were chatting on the phone as he walked through the store (also looking for a white elephant gift) naming things as he passed.

When he said nativity set for $4 I said, "Buy it!" 

I'd been wanting one for a while but put it off knowing my kids would play with it and not be so gentle.  But heck, for $4 why not?

When he brought it home, I was excited to set it up.  And as we pulled each piece out of the box all carefully wrapped in bubble wrap and I wondered who would get rid of such a pretty porcelain, hand painted set. 

Until all the pieces were out and displayed and I surveyed the scene.

Hmmm...  Someone was missing.

An important player in the scene.

Darn it!  Baby Jesus is gone!

Now I need to find a substitute for the big guy.

I guess that you get what you pay for. 

Maybe for next year I should invest in a complete nativity set.

As Heard In the Back Seat

For the latest installment of: "As Heard in the Back Seat" I had to write it down at a stoplight on our way to the annual pre-school Christmas Program.

Crazy kids.

The biggest was with her nonna but the three littles were chatting it up, all in a row in the new silver bullet.  There's plenty of room for them to line up, side by side now.  Yay!

Say's Charlie to his big brother Carl, "Your chin has a belly button." 

He does have a cleft chin, which was WAY more noticeable when he was a chubby little baby.  And I've always worried about people saying he has a butt chin (don't let that give you any ideas...)

They both giggled over it.

Then, not to be out done, little miss Elsa chimed in,

"What if your face had a vagina."

Extra prayers were said when we were seated in the church.

On the plus side, little Miss Elsa wore a skirt and ruffled pink cardigan sweater tonight and didn't hide herself.

Vagina comment aside, tonight was a major victory in my book!

Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day

Even parents have days like that.

Yesterday was mine.

If there was any day I could use a do-over button, it would have been yesterday.

I suppose we all make mistakes.

And most of us (if we're realistic) feel like the worst parents on the face of the earth at some point during our parenthood.

That was me yesterday.

Thankfully, the day of disappointments ended.

It felt like it took an eternity and packed in some whopper mistakes.

But it's over and today was FAR better.

One foot in front of the other.

One step at a time.

Deep breaths.

The things I try to remind myself of when days feel impossible, overwhelming, and horrible.

It was a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day. 

Even here in Olympia.

Thank God it's behind me.